Know Your Zosos from Your Ziljians

Everyone from Bob Lefsetz to your brother has lamented how bad the new music is today.  It doesn't take a rock star to come to this realization.

Ah, spin class, the trusty go-to for exposure to new music.  Spinning today to LMFAO's "Party Rock Anthem," which hit #1 on charts last year throughout Europe, the UK, the US, New Zealand and Australia, got me wondering:

What the heck is up this dreck?

The lyrics:  empty, offensive and below fraternity house antics.
The electronic beat:   catchy but gets annoying.
And the chutzpah to make a Zeppelin reference.
Where, exactly, is the skilled musicianship?
Nary a drum kit to be heard.
Oh, right, that is the definition of electronica.
And, shouldn't everyone in this tune be doing the Hollywood Shuffle instead?  Now, that is quality shufflin'.
The part that bothers me is the thought of the millions of kids listening to this as their early exposure to music.
Oy.


I don't even want to watch this video.
But for pure illustration purposes, here it is.




Ok, I do like to focus on the positive.  I appreciate the club kid influence as evident in some of the outfits in the video and the dude with the big fro's huge white glasses, reminiscent of Laura Biogottis from the 80s.  I like the acting in the beginning.  And, nice fancy steps at the end of the video.   That's about it.

Still, I continue to lobby for real music like Kashmir in spin class.
Robert Plant.  Now there's a rock star.




Then I can envision myself as Jennifer Jason Leigh in "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" and rock it out on the spin bike like it's 1982.

(they cut out at 2:00 when Kashmir comes on the scene.)
This scene is the reason why I bought Led Zeppelin IV on tape, one of my earliest music purchases.

And we all know that Kashmir ain't to be found on that album!
Oh, Cameron Crowe, the film's screenwriter, is a genius culture maker of my generation.




Good thing the Allmans let him tag along as a teenager.

It sounds so cliche to think it was all better when you were a teenager, but I do think that when it comes to music and popular culture, I was better off without the acronym and certainly the band LMFAO.

Ghetto Love To You, Daniel Son

Leave it to spin class to make me feel old.  I am not talking about knee pain, muscle soreness or not being able to keep up with the peppy 20-something instructors.  As I frequently mention, spin class keeps me in check with new music.  Even if it isn't exactly my speed, it gives me a sense of being down with popular culture.  I am not the hippest of mamas, but I know more music than the average Whole Foods shopper.   So when Karl Wolf's "Ghetto Love," which samples Peter Cetera's "Glory of Love," played on the speakers at this morning's class, I was instantly reminded that my memory is going everywhere but up.

 

As long as you didn't live on some hippy commune or in Satmar Williamsburg, if you came of age in the United States during the 80s, you most likely recognize the familiar refrain "I am the man who will fight for your honor, I'll be the hero that you're dreaming of."  It was in a really popular movie that I saw a lot.  The problem was that I could not recall which one.  Or who sang it.  And I knew that I saw this movie many, many times over.  I kept knocking on my brain and no one answered.  I was sure that I slow-danced to this tune with my first boyfriend at a BBYO Beau-Sweetheart Dance.  I most likely cried many tears to it while listening on a Maxell II-S mix tape entitled "Rachel's Love Songs."  And yet, I.Could.Not.Remember.  Oy, I thought to myself, now I am really turning into my mother.

The thing that really got my goat was that none of the other women in spin class could place it either.  But for a different reason.  Not because their brains have been fried from working, cooking, cleaning, homework-checking, schedule-managing, and all the other stuff that comes along with parenting.  These women were obviously younger than me, and I realized that their lack of recognition was likely because they were still in diapers at the time of the debut of "Glory of Love."

As we were all toweling off at the end of class, one woman Shazamed it and reported that the original song was by the band Chicago.  Ah, this made sense to me.  It did, after all, SOUND like Chicago.  Thank God for Wikipedia to inform me later on that Peter Cetera released this song as a solo shortly after he left Chicago.

To the rescue came a guy who was spinning in the front row and whom I will call Daniel.  He was clearly closer to my generation than the young women I previously asked:

"Karate Kid, all the way," Daniel said.  Phew!  What relief!





But he didn't get it fully on-target.

Daniel Son, it was Karate Kid II.  Time for us Gen Xers to get a brain check.

Spin Class Song Request

One reason I go to spin class is to get motivated by a great instructor with great music and who pushes me in a way I can't do on my own.  Usually the music is new stuff that I would otherwise never hear.  Even if most of it is dreck (unworthy garbage) I appreciate the sentiment, because it keeps me current with popular culture.  But for whatever reason, there is a thought that new music is the only music that people want to hear in spin class and can't grind it out to anything else.

Not me!

Spin instructors of the world:  bring on the classic rock.  Where are Pink Floyd, Aerosmith and Led Zeppelin among the your playlists?   I'm not talking Stairway to Heaven, which is slow and drawn out, but tunes like Money, Rag Doll, and Kashmir could get my cadence to 130 just as well as any Jay-Z or Rihanna tune  (not those artists produce garbage-like music; I actually like their stuff.  It's the other dreck that I am talking about).

One instructor told me that jam band tunes are too long, and preferred spin songs are no more than 4 minutes.  Check out this very rocking instrumental Frankenstein, originally by the Edgar Winter Group, and covered by my favorite band.





But if you think it is too jammy, just cut it short.  No one would mind.

In Through the Back Door? Out Through the In Door?

I've said it before and I'll say it again:

I love spin class, and one day when I grow up and become a spin instructor, I will pump out the jam band tunes (shorter jams, under 7 minutes) because they are the most rockin' out there.

Boy did I ever love that Ferris commercial last night.





 You are speaking right to me, Matthew Broderick! Actually I really love you here, too:


 



 Which leads me to Zeppelin. In Through the Out Door...


Would that fly in spin class? Me thinks yes.


Oh, yeah, and the password for the back door?  Do I really need to spell it out for you?

J-O-S-H-U-A   (I loved the intonation of Ally Sheedy's voice as she said it in "War Games")

How many Joshuas do you know?

I can count many.  Many, many, many.  And I love them all.

Barbra Streisand by Duck Sauce Went Viral Last Fall...Where Was I???

(Disclaimer, my daughter Concealed Light peeked her head in just now as I am watching the video below and said, "Inappropriate.")

Certainly not at spin class, otherwise I would have been enlightened much earlier...

For my Mah Jongg ladies (that would be you, mom)...

For my gay friends (that would be you, Tim, my coworker at HBO who was from the South and wore silver spandex glitter pants to our annual party at Tavern on the Green...actually I am sorry for being so stereotypical, I only partially recall that you loved Barbra.)...

For guys named Elliot  (as in her first husband)...

For anyone who appreciates the date April 24th (meaning, you are a true Barbra Streisand fan.  That would be my mother, not me.)...

Click this caption below this photo to get to the video of the Barbra Streisand song, by Duck Sauce (DJs Armand Van Helden and A-Trak, Alain Macklovitch a Jewish guy from Montreal), that went viral last fall  (yea, currently over 60 MM views on YouTube... that would be millions for those of you who are unaware of Wall Street abbreviations):

no, I do not own this image.  I copied it from some web site.  Not worth suing me.  Would rather just embed the YouTube video, but Spinnin' Records doesn't want to allow that, which I think is utterly ridiculous.  Come on, my Dutch friends, you will be doing the world a complete service if you allow embedding on folks' websites.  Oh well, I still love Holland.  You do bikes, mass transit, congeniality, tulips, world peace and coffee shops very well.  Apparantly food, too.  Did you see the recent NY Times article about the improvement of Dutch food'?  No hard feelings, 'kay?

http://youtu.be/uu_zwdmz0hE   click that link   will get you there, too.

Did you see Philadelphian DJ ?uestlove in there?
Kanye West, also
Ezra Koenig
and more current musicians whose work I really don't know!

Thank you Katie, my most awesome spin instructor for the most excellent new tunes!  As a full-time mom who doesn't get to a single dance club these days (did I ever?), I rely so much on Spin Class for the good new tunes!

And here is Why I Know The Significance of the Date April 24th.  Again, Thank You Mother!
(start at around 3:00, and then Barbra gets to the punchline, which she CHANGED in the TV version of "I'm Five" to April 29th!  Oh, Barbra, you are too much!)







Finally, here is NPR's coverage by Guy Raz, a star reporter at NPR and a few years younger than me at Brandeis, about "Why Club DJs Love Barbra Streisand."


Here is some Vampire Weekend, with Ezra Koenig, in case you had no clue who that was...

 

From Rihanna to Eddie Murphy in 30 Seconds Flat...Mama Say What?!

(disclaimer: if you really want to get it done in 30 seconds, do not watch the embedded videos!)


 Yesterday, towards the end of spin class, Rihanna's "Don't Stop the Music" came on the speakers.  Ever so conveniently placed, indeed I didn't want the music to end, since I was finally getting my spin groove on.  I am not very contemporary with popular music, so I owe much of my knowledge and exposure to it via my excellent spin instructors.  In truth, I don't connect much to the music:  the beat seems somewhat empty to me.  I am a classic rock and Jam band type of mama.  I don't like how women are objectified.  I certainly don't want my children watching this video.  Stango would definitely not be into it.

Rihanna is beautiful despite the fact that I don't agree that she uses her body, sex and overall image to sell herself.  Isn't that Hollywood, though?  She has made a career out of it, and I give her that.  I am sure she is a hard worker.



Ever interested in connections, I love how she borrows from Michael Jackson's "Wanna Be Startin' Something" when she says "mama say mama sah mama makusa"




Ever thirsty for knowledge, I researched that phrase, which, according to this Wikipedia entry, has its roots in Makossa music, which is popularized in Camaroon cities.

Call me an ignorant American, but I don't know much about Camaroon.

Except for this classic scene from "Trading Places," where Eddie Murphy pretends to be an exchange student from Camaroon.






Which leads me back to the City of Brotherly Love, where this film is largely based.

It is my new city and it is a good one!